I’ve only ever seen proposals in movies. Maybe I’m too young of an adult to witness one in real life. I think that kind of stuff is supposed to come in my thirties, when my friends finally find loves that last long enough to commit to.

Unfortunately, I’m in my twenties, the age where everyone tries a dating app at least once. And if you’re not out clubbing to meet someone new, then you’re probably just at home doomscrolling countless videos in bed.

It’s always one thing after another. Nothing lasts long enough at this age. Unless you’re really, really lucky.

I stood alone, underneath the bus stop sign at the edge of the plaza. I was eager to go home. The sky was a brilliant blue, and the weather was actually being nice for once. It would’ve been a perfect day to share with someone. But, I’m not that lucky.

I glanced around to admire the serenity of the plaza. There was a guy walking a small dog, sniffing around in the grass. I looked away when it got into a position to pee. My gaze landed on two children, playing near the fountain. Even though I didn’t know them, I involuntarily checked if their parents were nearby, because someone had to make sure they wouldn’t fall in. That elderly couple? Probably not. That group of high schoolers? Definitely not.

Then I spotted a couple my age. No, they certainly weren’t parents, but what made my stare linger was the fact that the man was holding a box behind his back. A small box. A ring box?

My lips parted in realization, my brows unfurrowing. I slowly took off my headphones, pressing a button on the side to pause my music. But I still couldn’t hear them.

I could tell the man was nervous. God, I would be too. He ran his hand through his tousled hair, shifting his weight as he seemed to ramble. He couldn’t maintain eye contact. The woman’s arms were crossed, smiling lightly and nodding along.

It wasn’t until the man got down on his knee when everyone noticed it too.

The elderly couple looked up from the spot on their bench. One of the two children gasped loudly and exclaimed “look!” which prompted the dog to turn its head. And the guy walking it turned his head too. Then one of the people in the group of high schoolers pointed it out to their friends, and even more pairs of eyes jumped on the bandwagon.

All the onlookers didn’t go unnoticed by the couple, and the man became so much more anxious that I could see his hands shaking.

I was a contradiction to my own thoughts. I felt guilty about how nervous he was from everyone watching, and yet I couldn’t look away.

In spite of himself, the man took the box out from behind his back and presented the ring. I couldn’t tell the woman’s reaction through her hands covering her mouth. Nor could I really see the ring from here, but the way the high schoolers squealed made me presume it was an impressive piece of jewellery.

I felt a flutter of hope, my heart swelling with anticipation and disbelief. I didn’t even try to hide the growing smile on my face. And for some reason, I felt like crying. Why? I didn’t even know these people. Was it joy? Sonder? Jealousy? I don’t think I’ll ever understand why I felt like crying in this moment.

Either way, I clasped my hands, getting ready to applaud when the woman would accept.

…But she didn’t.

My jaw dropped as she suddenly bolted away, avoiding eye contact with the elderly couple as she sprinted past their bench to exit the plaza. The dog barked, clearly wanting to chase her more than the man did.

No, he was still there. Alone, watching her go. His eyes became glossy with tears as his other knee dropped, kneeling on both of them now. His mouth was opening and closing, but he couldn’t muster the strength pull his voice up his throat. He sat back on his heels, his gaze falling like his heart to his stomach. Then the man hunched over as if he was wounded in his chest.

I’ve never seen someone look so heartbroken before.

My first instinct was to despise that woman. How could she leave him there like that? How could she? What kind of human would be so merciless as to tear someone’s heart apart so brutally?

But, then I remembered I didn’t even know her. Maybe she felt pressured because he proposed in public. Or maybe she didn’t love him anymore to no fault of her own.

The high schoolers walked away awkwardly. The children had the opposite reaction, and tried to approach the man, but their parents—wherever they came from—swooped in and led them away. My legs were moving before I realized what I was doing.

I took a step forward and stopped. I hesitated. Then I felt bad for hesitating, and went through with it. If no one was going to help him, then I would. Someone had to. I left the bus stop and walked up to the lone man sobbing on the ground, watching him for a moment as I tried to find my words. Now I was the nervous one.

“…Hey…” I said softly, reluctantly kneeling down to meet his height. “Are you okay?”

What a stupid question. I clenched my jaw and glanced away as I realized I could’ve said anything but that. He didn’t react to my presence, so I tried again.

“I… Here, I have tissue, if you need some.” I offered gently, digging into my pocket for a napkin I got from the food I had earlier. I held it out to him.

The man didn’t move, at first. Then he leaned up slightly to meet my eyes. I bit my lip and tried not to cry at the sight of his grief-stricken face. He reached out a trembling hand for the tissue and brought it to his nose. He blew into it.

“Th-thank you.” The man murmured. He had a rich, deep voice, cracking and shaking with emotion.

I gingerly rubbed his back, going silent and patiently letting him digest his emotions.

I don’t know how long I spent at his side. I probably missed my bus, which meant I’d have to wait another twenty minutes, but I didn’t care about that as much as I thought I would. I just remained here, keeping my hand on his back as he shamelessly cried into the napkins I kept giving him.

The man’s emotions came in like a storm, and I stayed with him until the downpour became a drizzle. Gradually, his sobs turned into small gasps, and the drying tears left his eyes red. I could feel that he wasn’t shaking anymore either.

“Thank you.” The man croaked out again, looking up at me with a weak smile—the first time I had ever seen him smile. “I’m sorry for being an inconvenience.”

“No,” I replied almost immediately, “No, you aren’t an inconvenience. It’s fine, really. I don’t have anything else to do.” I reassured, despite the chores I had at home. “…Do you want to talk about it? We can go somewhere else.”

I suggested to go somewhere other than here, because people were still glancing over. I didn’t want his misery to be presented so publicly. He deserved dignity.

“Where?” The man asked quietly, before blowing his nose into the napkin and adding it to the small pile on his lap.

“Um,” I glanced around and noticed a familiar cafe nearby. “Do you… like bubble tea?” I asked awkwardly.

The man smiled softly and nodded. I grinned warmly.

I grunted as I stood up, dusting off my legs. I watched him do the same, albeit slowly since he had to put his used napkins and unused ring box in his pockets. I offered my hand to help him stand. He took it, his grip stronger than I thought it’d be, then I hoisted him up.

I realized how tall he was—how masculine he was. He definitely didn’t look like the type of guy to break down, he looked like he could _break things down instead. _But here he stood, twiddling his thumbs and looking at me like a puppy. I couldn’t help but smile again.

No further words were exchanged as I gestured for him to follow me. And he did. I figured we’d probably end up spending the rest of the day together while I helped him through this.

So we were lucky that the sky was a brilliant blue, and the weather was actually being nice for once.

Weathered porcelain skin Crimson lips strike Sad eyes, black matte tears I wonder what organ note is played as each falls Like each pump of a heart, Everything’s caused

Crossing through the line of traffic that day was the best worst decision I’d ever made. My eyes met a divine queen who was seated at the front seat of her black Porsche or in other words, her throne. I stopped and glanced at her for three seconds hoping she’d recognize me but she payed no mind. I didn’t know this woman but I can tell you everything from looking at her. She had the most translucent personality by the way her silky hair fell on both sides of her face and the way she applied her cherry lip balm on while pounding a 2014 Rihanna song that flowed through her windows leaving the car. To her, she had probably ignored me a mere bystander crossing the traffic at that time but to me, I wondered if I’ll ever lay eyes on my queen again. The morning after, while standing on the pavement waiting to cross the street once again, my lady flew righht passed me, I uttered with the wind to send my words her way, “I know you my long awaited love.” Every morning after for three months, while on my way to work, I’d take the same route just to see her. And one day, she acknowledged me. She let me cross and I winked at her. The highlight of my day was when her cheeks pushed upwards blushing in reaction to my wink. Finally I was brave enough to get her number. And I did, or we did. We held up an unhealthy amount of traffic but in our moment of joy our eyes met and the angry drivers were at the back of our minds. A couple weeks later I sat in her passenger seat sharing coffee with her, making my way to work. Nothing had made me more elated, knowing the wait was worth while. A thousand dates of tasting her cherry lip balm we-

broke up.

And still she was worth the wait. We were soulmates but in a best friend type of way. She settled down had kid and got married, I attended all of her family events and became her kids godfather. We were good and helpful to each other, shared advice and lived peacefully with each other. I would go on to share my little love story with my friends.

I watch as they walk toward the perfect, saturated sunset, hands linked.  He spins her around; she laughs as her soft white dress billows out around her.  A smile twitches at the corner of his mouth as she kisses his cheek.

It’s funny, I think, how everyone says that love like theirs is special, one-of-a-kind, though it seems to happen all the time to other people.  As a wedding photographer, I’ve seen couples just like them almost every day for the past seven years.  Smiling pairs, dancing on beaches, kissing in churches, holding hands in an autumn-colored forest.

Sometimes I wonder what that’s like.  To feel like you’re holding the world when you’re just holding a hand.  To be so in love with someone that your souls seem to intertwine along with your fingers, to memorize their image and find a strange, fluttering comfort in its flaws.  To sink into a wonderful sort of symbiosis with another human being, and spend your whole, long life growing alongside them.

It’s not even that I can’t feel that way. I’ve had my fair share of friendships that have made me feel on top of the world. It’s that I can’t feel it exactly the same way this twirling, copy-and-paste couple standing before me does. It’s that I can’t get married, or settle down, or devote my whole self entirely to one person when I have so many friends I care too much about. It’s that my stomach lurches every time I hear the words “I love you” and “my darling” and “forever”. And it’s because of that that I’m never going to be a bride. 

No, I will stay the photographer, the bystander, the one on the sidelines.  I’ll always be the one who’s ridiculed at family gatherings and met with awkward pitying smiles at high school reunions.  While my cousins and old friends are living out their romance movie storyline, I’ll always be sitting here, taking photos by myself, as the ultimate aromantic comedy show.

It was a bad time But we always got through And i remembered to say I love you But maybe now I am too late Maybe now Im not ok

Never wanted to say goodbye Never understood why See your face in every place There’s dead flowers in the vas Never thought you would leave Never thought it would be me

Who do i talk to about these things Watching happy people with new wedding rings I don’t even know what is wrong I took a break from writing songs I don’t think anyone will sing along But you would if you were still here

How do I say goodbye All I do is lie When someone asks how are you I will always say fine I am always forgetting the line I am always wasteing my time I don’t even know how to be kind When I am dying on the inside

It was my worst fear and it came true I was so scared of losing you Forgot the girl Kept the pearls Shook up my now empty world

How do I say goodbye ( never wanted to say goodbye)

Never understood why ( all I do is lie) When someone asks how are you I will always say fine ( see your face in every place)

Dead flowers in the vase Forgetting the line Wasting my time Never thought Never thought you would leave Never thought never thought I would be dying on the inside

I stop They dance in the street He can’t take his eyes off her Sucked in by her presence Could someone ever look at me that way? Tears A shattered mirror of reflection I continue my stroll The sound of their footsteps fade Out of sight and out of mind For nothing is more lonely Than watching others fall in love…

The hotel bar was class personified; shiny brass features, sleek leather seats, soft, low lighting. I sipped my tequila soda, the condensation on it running down the length of the crystal whiskey glass, gently landing on my laptop keyboard.

The allure of the soft jazz music and enjoyable atmosphere had been too much to resist when I had returned, exhausted, from the end of a long day of conferencing with still yet more work to do. If I was working until midnight, it may as well be in a beautiful, soothing setting, with an ice cold drink in hand.

Stretching my arms above my head, I took a moment to drink in my surroundings, observing the other patrons covertly from my secluded booth in the corner. The bar was crowded, filled with excited travelers chatting over daiquiris and bored looking business men tapping away on their phones, glasses of whiskey reflecting the light of the chandelier overhead.

My gaze caught on a man at the far end of the bar; thick, sandy hair was perfectly tousled, a crisp white button down peaking out of his navy sports coat. Unlike the other bar patrons, he wasn’t absorbed in a conversation or a book or laptop. He simply sat, drink in hand, observing the space, as I myself did.

And then he turned to look at me.

I felt my mouth dry out.

Piercing green eyes bored into my own, pinning me to my seat. It felt as if I’d lost complete control over my limbs. A slight smirk turned one side of his mouth up, as if he knew exactly the kind of person I was with this one look.

After several long seconds he turned his attention to the bartender, and flagged him down. I took a sudden inhale, realizing that I had been holding my breath, and turned my attention back to my laptop. I stared intently at the screen, seeing nothing, trying to mentally stop the flush spreading to my cheeks.

“Hi there.” I tried to act as nonchalant as possible as the stranger suddenly appeared out of nowhere, sliding into the seat across from me. “I’m Jaime. Mind if I join you?”

Shutting the laptop, I waved a hand airily, indicating my feigned indifference. Up close he was even more stunning, his strong jaw line prominently on display, a faint smell of clean linen about him.

He leans in towards me, making my heart race. “Can I tell you something?”

I nod, absolutely losing any ability of speech.

“You’re magnetic. When I saw you from over there, I knew I had to come speak to you. It’s like I’ve known you all my life and only just remembered it.”

Stunned, I try to think of something, anything, to say in response, as the stranger flags the bartender for another round of drinks for us both.

He turned back to me, a cheeky smile on his face. “Working? In these conditions?”

I couldn’t help but return his smile. “I think you’re right,” I said, shutting my laptop. “Best to save it for the office.”

Jaime was charming, easy to talk to. The conversation - and the drinks - flowed. After a another generous gin and tonic arrived at the table, I excused myself to the ladies room, flushed from the alcohol and the attention of a good looking man.

Jaime, sitting alone at the table, pulled his phone out and fired off a quick text message, keeping a covert eye on the other bar patrons. Subtly, he reaches below the table and dislodges a small package taped to its underside. Without looking at it, he slips it into his pocket and returns to his phone, sending off another text message quickly. Within moments, it begins to ring in his hand.

“Talk to me Dex.”

“Great job on getting the first package, we were beginning to worry when it looked like that woman wasn’t moving anywhere anytime soon. The next one is in the third stall of the men’s room on the second floor; remove it and await further instructions in your room.”

“Roger.” Jaime hangs up without any further discussion, and looks almost wistfully at the half gone drink still sitting on the table. The woman really had been beautiful; in a different world, this may have been the start of something.

But it wasn’t. And he had a job to do.

I watched as a new person stepped onto the stage. The music started as she sang karaoke, it didn’t sound particularly lovely. I noticed a girl, probably fourteen or fifteen, walking down the row of chairs toward me. Well, I thought toward me. She was walking behind my chair toward our parish’s group. The girl immediately started to sing and dance with the others. Her voice was a little pitchy and her dancing was all over the place. Yet, the excitement and happiness coming off her was like a magnet. It made me want to get up and join in. But I didn’t. I just watched her jump up and down, yelling the words of the song. She knew every line, every pause, and every beat. When the song ended, her chest rose up and down quickly as she smiled and talked with the girl beside her. I couldn’t look away from her bright brown eyes. She was beautiful. Her hair was long and pulled into a ponytail with a few stragglers tucked behind her ears. She had clear glasses that made her abundance of freckles and long eyelashes pop. She was wearing the same shirt as me but somehow it looked better on her, even though it was one size too big. The shorts she was wearing were black athletic ones that exposed her strong legs. I noticed how she never stood with both knees locked. She was always leaning into her hip with a knee bent. Odd. The next song that came on was slower so people started waving their arms high. As did the girl. She noticed that I wasn’t waving mine, so she told me, “Come on, you’ve gotta wave.” Then she pulled my arms over my head and swayed my wrists side to side. Her grip wasn’t too tight, as if she was allowing me to pull out of it. She had small hands with extremely short nails that looked like she picked them nervously. Once I started waving, she smiled and took the seat next to me. We started to talk about casual things until another song came on. She immediately jumped out of her seat and rushed to the empty space behind me to dance. “I love this song!” She said happily. The singer on the stage started to sing, but I only watched the girl singing passionately behind me. I watched her intently and smiled as she danced around. She looked over at me and smiled. “Why are you staring? Come dance!” So I did. I joined her and bopped my head. This song wasn’t what I normally listened to. It was a Taylor Swift song about some boy called You Belong With Me. At first I didn’t like it, but when the girl beside me pointed at me and sang loudly “You belong with meeeeee” it became my new favorite. I knew that she was joking and just singing the lyrics, yet I still felt myself blush.

Here I was buyin some fruit for the week when I spot a couple kissin by the big tree in town square. There’s a legend that if you kiss under that tree you’ll be together forever, how sweet. The two look like they’ve seen things, the man had some huge scars on his face and looked partly blind from some explosion. The shorter girl had a cybernetic right leg from her knee down and her hair was slightly singed at the ends like she’s been shot at and just barley escaped. Those two have definitely been through something together but giving how their looking at each other with tears in there eyes and smiles on their faces I have a feeling there gonna be together for a long time.

The café buzzed with the usual morning chatter, the clinking of cups, and the soft hum of conversation. I sat by the window, nursing a cappuccino and watching the world go by. That's when I noticed them.

They were seated at a small table in the corner, a man and a woman, lost in their own world. She had a laugh that seemed to light up the room, and he watched her with a tenderness that was palpable even from across the café. There was something about the way they looked at each other that drew my attention.

She reached across the table, her fingers lightly grazing his. It was a small gesture, but it spoke volumes. He smiled, a genuine, warm smile that crinkled the corners of his eyes. Their hands lingered together, fingers intertwined in a silent communication that was both intimate and profound.

They talked in hushed tones, their faces animated with expressions of joy, curiosity, and something deeper. Every so often, he would lean in, brushing a strand of hair from her face, his touch as gentle as a whisper. She would respond with a soft smile, her eyes never leaving his.

I couldn't hear their words, but I didn't need to. The way they moved together, the unspoken connection between them, was more eloquent than any dialogue. It was in the way she leaned into him when he spoke, the way he held her gaze as if she was the only person in the room.

They shared a slice of cake, laughing as they fed each other bites. It was a simple, ordinary moment, yet it felt like a scene from a love story. Their joy was infectious, and I found myself smiling along with them, caught up in the purity of their interaction.

As they stood to leave, he helped her with her coat, his hands lingering on her shoulders a moment longer than necessary. She looked up at him, her eyes shining with affection. They walked out hand in hand, their fingers intertwined, leaving the warmth of their connection lingering in the air.

I took a sip of my now lukewarm cappuccino, feeling a sense of warmth spread through me. I didn't know their story, but in that brief encounter, I witnessed something beautiful—a love that was tender, genuine, and unreserved. It was a reminder of the simple, profound beauty of human connection, and it left me with a sense of hope and joy that carried me through the rest of the day.