_*TW: dark themes*_

__

__

__

__

_“Swallow me whole.”_ I begged. My bright, colorful room filled with nothing but dread. Door shut, thuds of loved ones before they give up. Shouting _“STOP BEING LAZY! You’re such a screw up.”_ I welk in my bed, enacting evey berufen I know so that the monsters will leave my head. Confined in my room, weighted with items of tremendous memories. Walls of posters, sh...

I’m so sorry.

I’m so fricking sorry.

This is all my fault.

I hurt you,

I hurt you in the worst way possible,

And you forgave me.

You gave me a second chance,

One I didn’t deserve.

One I still don’t.

You gave me something I never earned,

Something I probably never will.

I’m just not enough.

I don’t know how to be.

I swear to you,

I’m not trying to be annoying or hurtful

Or rude

Or insulting

Or dram...

Swallow. Choke it down. They don't really want your truths after all. When they ask how you are, it is all just a test to see how well you keep the words clenched between your teeth. If you bite down on them hard enough, it starts to look like a smile.

Hidden. That's what you are. Your true self is locked away. It is the mask they truly seek anyway. The face you wear in a crowd. The one they fin...

Swallow. That's what I do with the guilt, every single day. Guzzle it down like some bitter cocktail. And goddamn does it hurt. Like shards of glass, easing their way down my throat Seven years is a long time to spend with just one man. Seven years—seven years of shared highs and lows, of escaping reality together until it all came crashing down. I remember the day he left this world, taken by a ...

Swallow it!? I was supposed to swallow that!? It was bubbling and was a horrid shade of purple. Though I suppose it wouldn’t matter what it tasted like because if I drink this I’ll be dead in a few moments. I knew this was the only way to stop all my worries.

Hidden behind the feeling that was telling me to do this was a sense that I would regret this. Well I couldn’t regret it because I would be...

“Swallow it.”

“W-wait, what?” I stammered. I looked down at the weird foaming and fuzzy mixture in the glass. It was changing from

color to color but not beautiful bright colors like you might see in a children’s nursery book, no sir-ee, these were dark, odd, hideous colors that made me wanna puke. When I looked up at Bryce, he was giving me a look that made it clear he wasn’t gonna repeat himsel...

Swallow that shallow hole,

that sorta pit you call a soul.

Or fall in - turning inside,

imploding in your empty life.

Hidden truths now brought to light.

Seeking light in darkened blight.

Falling down in to the night -

into the night you hold inside.

Guilt awaits you in your dreams.

Hate will drown out all your screams.

Light will turn its back and leave.

So learn to love from what’s per...

Swallow, that you will never be the same. Live the same. That this is a definitive moment in your history. As the blood seeps through your fingers, you recognize this. Close your eyes, and feel the warmth of the liquid surrounding you.

Hidden, are the ways of the world. Why does it beat down on some who have nothing but raise those with too much on a podium for everyone to gaze at? What will be g...

Swallow. You can’t just ignore this problem. Your gonna have to swallow and digest it. This is your problem. You’re responsible. You are the one they are counting on. This is because of you. Your fault. Even if you don’t want them to find out, you know they will. Eventually. You can’t keep it hidden.

Hidden? Can this thing stay hidden any longer? How could you make it so? No. No, no, no. You ca...

I look at the pills

They stare back

My family stares at me

I avoid their eyes

This could change everything.

Suddenly I grab them

Then throw them into my mouth

I swallow

With a massive gulp of water

It’s done.

I’ve been taking them for a while

But still feel a sense of shame

If someone comes round

I scramble

To quickly hide them.

But slowly they start to take effect

The w...