I wish you could remain exactly how you are in my memory;

Tinted in a perfect rose gold.

But instead you are slowly fading;

Tainted by colors I don’t want to see.

I wish I didn’t have to see.

I wish I didn’t have to know.

And maybe that’s why I’m so scared to reach out,

Scared to try to catch up with the people who made me happiest.

I want to, I really do.

I miss them so, so badly.

But every t...

Work a nine to five

Contemplate at night

Dripping faucets’ water

Is your favourite lonely pleasure

Give up all your dreams

Swim in depth so deep

Pay your bills each week

It’s just drippy faucets’ water

Forget to pray to God

Who cares, he’s not in charge

Tithes are for the weak

Liks dripping faucets’ water

Evaluate your mental state

Therapy costs too much anyways

You are drippy faucets’ water

Y...

I’m like a black cat

Looking down on people

Unamused

I want attention

But will not ask

Seen as bad luck

If you cross my path

It’s selfish to want

To be so needy

I want your presence

In the room I sit

Maybe light chatter

That’s all I ask

It’s a lot I know

But one day I’ll find

Someone who sees me

Even though I’m greedy

And loves me so much

That I think

“Am I dreaming?”...

Staring in the mirror

I raise my hand

The girl in the mirror raises her hand

I touch my face, I feel my fingers against my cheek

The girl in the mirror does the same

I recognize that I’m touching something, that I’m feeling something

But I’m not really there.

I stare into my own eyes

My reflection does nothing.

I know I should feel something

So why don’t I?

Why have all my emotions left me?

It ...

It started as a song

But I’ve lost the melody.

Sitting at the grown up table,

_Is_ anyone stable?

I talked with the faces

Washed my hands with the broken flowers vases.

Sat with strangers on those stone-hard benches

Followed His tears in those life-worn trenches,

No one really wants to see over their neighbors fences.

Well

The absence of warmth. That’s how I’d describe it. The echo and th...

From as long as I can remember I was broken, forgotten and unseen,

From all the ones that were supposed to be there for me,

Dad always leaving me on the floor crying and bleeding,

From all the abuse and meaningless beatings,

My Mothers blank stare that continued without a care cut deeper than anything,

And my Brother and Sister we’re nothing but bitches always lying and deceiving,

So much for the ...

Is it real,

All those looks of admiration?

Or is it a game,

To see how hard she falls?

Is it real,

That you want to know her name?

Or is it a game,

So you can tell them who it was who fell?

Is it real,

Going out of your way to be near her, to see her?

Or is it a game?

Tell, please,

Is it real, or is it a game?...

I miss the times when my thoughts were overthrown

With thoughts of her

Not with thoughts of wanting to be dead

She would take over my brain for hours

With scenarios

Dreams

Hopes

Wishes

Now instead of her my thoughts are with suicide

Life

Death

Blade

I wish I could go back

To my sane mind

I need to go back

Please?...

If I see what I feel, I’d live in a meadow of daisy’s, along the shore, and I’d always be on a horse’s back. If I could see what I feel, the sky would be a permanent sunset. You could walk on the clouds. They would taste like cotton candy. And the sun! The sun would be kind, and keep everyone warm. She’d back off in the summer, and be sure not to roast us. There could be no money, so everyone just...

I’m not good with people

Bad at making friends

But what I know is

They’ll leave me in the end

They need me for a while

Because they’re lonely too

But then they’ll find a true friend

And I’ll be left again

I’m a shelter, a temporary home

For them to come and go

Till they completely tire

So I have just one question

When will you leave too?...