Every tear you shed sparks a fire in my chest I can’t describe this feeling I hate to see the tears you shed But I love to see you cry

Your tears remind me that when you cry A piece of yourself leaves They run and trickle down your golden face

Your golden face makes me forget that you are human It is so perfect So pure

That’s why I love to see you cry When you cry It reminds me that you are human

Your face is too perfect Too pure I want to break it You make it so easy Too easy

I hate to see your tears I love to see you cry

Silas looks at me in the hallway. I walk without making eye contact, and I push my hair to ensure it covers the bruises. I don’t want him to know. I don’t want anyone to know. The noise of conversations bring me at ease. I am okay. I am okay. I am- Not okay. I feel Silas’ molten stare burn into me. Do I risk a glance? Yes. I look over and sure enough he’s staring. But not out of worry, no, he hasn’t noticed. He is staring at me with his stupid arrogant smile. Great. Another game.

Silas strides over to my locker and leans against it. “What do you want?” I ask annoyed. I am not in the mood to play his stupid games. “What makes you think I want something?” He says with a smirk. I glare at him and grab my books. The first bell just rung. “I’m not in the mood.” I say while walking away. He trails me. “You’re never in the ‘mood’” I take a deep breath. I can get through this. “Bye, Silas.” I walk into my classroom. “I’ll see you later, Willow.” I hope he forgets.

I manage to get through the school day, both avoiding Silas and my feelings. No one has noticed. Good. Though some part of me wanted someone to notice. I want help, but I’m scared. What if it’ll happen again. As I’m walking out of school, it all comes back.

I’m taking out the trash. It’s night and my parents are gone on a work trip. I’m alone and clueless.
A man, large and middle-aged, walks towards me, calling me names. I freeze in fear and before I can run for help, he has me. I thrash and scream, but he kicks me and kicks me and kicks me. I beg for him to stop. The pain is too much. Black spots dot my vision. I can’t pass out. He’ll take me. I can’t pass out. “Stop! Please stop!” I repeat over and over. Finally the man halts when headlights shine in the distance. He runs, and I am left broken.

“Willow? Willllllow? Willow! Hello, anyone home?” I jump back to reality. Silas is beside me, and his gaze darkens when he sees my bruises. “What the- Willow, who did this?” His deep voice says. No. No. No. please spare me. Please I cannot handle anymore humiliation. “Nothing.” I say keeping the tears at bay. Silas clenches his jaw. “That doesn’t look like nothing.” “Just leave me alone.” Oh no, don’t start crying Willow. Don’t start crying. “Willow-“ “I’m not up for one of your stupid pathetic games Silas! Just leave me alone!” I shout, tears betraying me and flowing down my cheeks. Silas immediately softens. “Willow.” He pleads. “I don’t know, Silas. I didn’t see him. He attacked me in the dark, and kicked me until I was screaming my lungs out. Silas—Silas” sobs break from my voice. Oh gosh, I’m crying in front of Silas. I shake and shake with the repeating memory. I feel warm hands pull my head up. Silas wipes my tears. “Every tear you shed sparks a fire in my chest. I can’t handle seeing you in pain. I will find him, Willow, and I promise, no mercy will be shown.” I lean into his warm embrace, I’m safe. I’m safe. I’m safe. I am safe. “I’ll never hear the end of this.” I laugh. “I promise, no more games, Willow. I’m here.” His voice brushes against my hair. “I am here, Willow.”

He walks me home and offers to stay the night, in case the man comes again. And this time I follow my heart. “Yes, but you’re sleeping on the couch. No funny business. My parents will kill me if they find out.” He smiles. “Ok Willow.” I think I might be alright. And I think I am falling for Silas. Shoot.

Wind howls, tornados swirl. Lightning flashes, thunder roars. Trees snap, people fly.

“You said you wouldn’t leave!” “You promised!”

We stand in the middle of the winds. Amongst the calmest of the storm.

Muted screams, deafening cries. A tear shed, raindrops fall.

“Where are you?” “Why did you leave?”

He stands, raindrops in his eyes. Muddy colored eyes like the wet ground.

“I’m sorry.” “You’re not.”

We step away from each other, and into the roaring storm.

Flying debris scratches at them. The wind claws at their clothes.

“Every tear you shed sparks a fire in my chest,” he claims.

But you can’t start a fire in the rain.

                      .•.•.•.•.•.

(Also would like to think the wonderful Shadow Mind 🖤, since he gave me the idea for the storm. Go check out his crazy cool writings! For finding my inspiration on this piece, go to his writing; “Promise”.)

I want to take your troubles away All the worries and all the pain Watching you crumble is breaking me You are all l ever wanted to be

You brought me into this world I can't watch you leave it That thought hurts I never want to see it

I want to hold you and take it away For a while you haven’t been the same

Every tear you shed sparks a fire in my chest All you do is try your best

Please be strong even when you don't wanna Just remember I love you Mamma!

Explicit. ❗❗❗🤬

A spotless canvas - little covering.

Displayed with the flashing lights and clangorous music.

The smell of cheap beer, loud pot, and sheer lust clinging to the air.

Music vibrates the stage. The sound resonates off of the pole

• as she clutches it between her legs.

The canvas moves to the melody.

Empty. Spotless. Not without an impression. Not without pain. Beautiful. Empty.

The dogs approach her, lustful hounds wishing nothing more than to spray the canvas. To leave their mark. They howl beneath her, gnashing their teeth. They imagine.

They imagine. They are empty. They are hellish.

The canvas tunes them out. She focuses on the peppermint lingering on her breath.

Liquid courage.

Each dollar tossed to the canvas only defiles her. She feels disgusting. She is disgusting. She is beautiful. They are disgusting.

The boy clacks away at his controller. He will beat the boss this time.

Surely.

He wonders how the canvas is. He is empty. He is foolish. He is nothing. He is apathy.

Why does the canvas save herself for him?

The man would strangle the boy, watching the light drain from his hollow eyes - cursing him for his inaction as his lungs collapse under the rage.

The boy would slay the man, make him pay for becoming a hound.

The boy would cut him down for his disloyalty. For his lusts. For his failure. For his wickedness.

    The canvas remains. 

 Scarred. 
    Scared. 
       Sacred. 
          Defiled. 
            Empty. 
                Beautiful. 

Torn.

I am sorry, my love.

You are an unfinished piece.

Every tear you shed sparks a fire in my chest, one day that flame will consume me

• and I will love you fully.

Least I burn myself instead by the sins I carry within my ashen soul.

Every tear you shed, Sparks a fire in my chest. I am jealous of the feelings, Jealous because I am impressed.

I couldn’t feel a tiny thing, For my emotions have turned numb. There wasn’t room for any pain, When my long day was done.

I wish that I could hurt that way, A way that makes me sad. But I take every giant loss, And pretend that I am glad.

Denial is my favourite thing, Though it makes me feel guilty. I can’t help but push from mind, The thoughts of pain that kill me.

A death of family rings a bell, But it was never real. At least in not in my mind because I didn’t really feel.

Maybe that's when it begins. Denial might appear When pain becomes too painful, And grief is all you fear.

Every tear you shed sparks a fire in my chest I know I should have you back in my arms You cheek nuzzled up against my breast Mother and son Just chilling and in love I never meant to break my word Everything I’ve been doing Is to get back to you You are my quest My person My son And the best thing I’ve done on this planet

It’s difficult, Watching your heart break. Knowing there is nothing I can do, To make it better. I’d do anything to make it stop, But it isn’t enough. Isn’t enough to stop the hurt you are feeling, Isn’t enough for you to go back to how you were, And that hurts me. It hurts me watching you hurt. Every time you cry it hurts me, Angers me, Every tear you shed sparks a fire in my chest.

Every tear you shed sparks a fire in my chest.

I never meant to make you cry,

That was my last intention.

But the world works in mysterious ways,

Putting people together,

And then tearing them apart,

Just to entertain itself.

I never meant to make you cry,

I still love you.

But I don’t think that’s enough anymore.

We were good while we lasted,

But too many arguments were had,

And too many tears were shed.

I would die for you,

Yet I can’t even look at your anymore.

Every tear you shed sparks a fire in my chest.

every tear you shed sparks a fire in my chest, the gap between us, an uninvited guest, the flames lick at my heart, burning, at the pit of my stomach, a lonely yearning,

we never talk in public, yet text all night, you know my each and every plight, when the waterfalls gush from your eyes, i do admit, a part of me dies,

i feel anger, hot and red, i feel sadness, a numb sensation in my head, i want to talk to you again, like we did back then,

when video calls were our normal, and the conversations we had in public were much less formal, but still our texts they stay the same, but the fire in my body knows this is not a game.