Her time is running up. She won’t eat. Soon she’ll be up. Up in heaven. She’s named after a flower. Daisy. Is it to late to recap our memories. The memories we made for 13 years You were by my side. Through everything. Your fun jumping when I get home from school. Our fun wrestling on the bed. Your my best friend. In dog form. Daisy. The name fits you well. Your beautiful in many ways. One day I’ll carry you with me everywhere. When I’m 18. I’ll get your mark on me. Our memories shared together. The day you came into our family. Is the day my life changed. With you in it I couldn’t think of anything else. But your time is running out. After 13 years you will no longer be in my life. But you’ll be in my heart. Your times up. I will miss your sweet and gentle face. Your nub of a tail. Your bucking like a bull. It’s to late. I want to spend more time with you. Before you go. Before you leave me. Oh Daisy. Daisy. Daisy. I wish to imagine a Daisy on my ankle. A mark that represents you. No dog can ever replace you. Daisy my sweet and beautiful girl. Oh how I miss going to the park with you. The memories of our old house. You use to open the bedroom doors. There’s no day I didn’t go with out a smile. Because you were always welcoming me home. But one day I won’t get to be welcomed. One day I’ll go to school and when I get home. You’ll be gone. My heart shatters when the thought of you leaving. But it’s time for you to go. I can’t stop that. Your time is running short. And I want to spend the rest of my time. By your side. Oh Daisy. Daisy. Daisy.

I was always scared of the ocean when I was young. I feared I’d be stung by a jelly fish. As I watch the waves wash from up the sand. I think of the ocean blue eyes that met mine. Your hair matched the sand of a beach. Your smile is as bright as the sun over the horizon. When I go to the beach I think of you. Your warm touch against mine. Like a sunburnt ready to burst. Your skin is as soft as the sand. Rough but soft. Today I went to the beach. The day you washed away. The day you sailed away. Was the day I was stung by that jelly fish. Although it wasn’t on my skin. It was on my heart. You washed away to soon. As I sit in the sand of the beach. It reminds me of the feeling of your skin. Against mine. Your eyes laid upon me the day you left. Slowly those ocean eyes began to freeze. As I watch you slowly slip away. You were drowning. I couldn’t help. You were to far gone. The ocean reminds me of you. One day I’ll get a house just upon the beach. So I can always look at you. From afar. The waves remind me of your curly hair. The view reminds me of you. The sun reflects your smile. The color of the ocean against the sky reminds me of your eyes. The dirt color sand remind me of your hair. When the sun goes down pinks and reds. Replace the blue sky. You always loved painting. I watched the sunset. I noticed you were painting the sky. It was beautiful. It shows how you made it up there. The ocean view reminds me of you. The ocean view reminds me of your kindness.

One day I was taking a hike around the forest. My house was right before the big tall trees. I usually have a daily hike around the forest. But then I began to hear some noises coming from an unknown place.

As I walk towards the noise I see a white elegant horse it’s mane reminded me of bright white crystals. You could almost believe it was a unicorn if you put a horn on top. The horse was majestic.

Then there was another horse it was opposite of the white horse. It was black like the midnight sky. The coats on the horse were absolutely magnificent. Unfortunately my admiring didn’t last long. They had spotted me from a bush. They began to run off before I knew it my feet took off too. I followed the horses and eventually after a while. My breath was heavy as I slowly caught my breath.

I glance up and I see a great big waterfall that dropped into a swimming hole. There were flowers everywhere that bloomed brightly. The horses stopped and began to drink the water. I’ve been in these woods before but I’ve never seen this area. I step out from hiding and luckily the horses didn’t run this time. I was to captivated on the scene before me.

“Oh wow!” I finally spoke I looked down at the flowers I brushed my finger across the flowers. They were delicate like an egg ready to be dropped. One of the horses came up to me. I hesitantly placed my hand on the bridge of their face. I pet them their coats felt like a soft and rough texture. I smiled as I took my phone out to capture this scene. I know for sure this will be my main area to hike to.

Wild horses surrounded the area I glance around and noticed different natural colored horses around as they ate the grass. And drunk the water that came from the crystal clear water.

Sometimes silence is an awkward feeling. Not with him. Silence is never awkward. It’s rather comforting. Although no one talks I can hear his thoughts. Silence makes me look at him. I’m mesmerized by him. Silence is not awkward. His sweet voice always rings through my mind. When he speaks or doesn’t speak. We have conversations through our silence. When he’s quiet I can tell by his silence. He’s a sweet boy. He’s nicer than you. The silence fills the room as we sit side by side. His shoulder brushed against mine. Either we’re doing homework. Or listening to music. I always enjoy his company. Every morning I see him. I get a rush of happiness. Although we don’t normally talk in the morning. But his company is more important than stupid conversations.

I regret loving you. I regret kissing you. The moment I regretted you. Was the moment you struck me. You struck my heart the day we met. You were sweet. But kindness is deadly. I regret falling for your tricks. Silly rabbit tricks are for fools. Past me was a fool. Falling in love with you. I regret giving you everything. I gave you my love. I gave you my support. I’m return I got violence. Violence! You said it would toughen me up. Get me ready for the future. There’s no future with you. I regret staying with you. You begged me not to leave. You called me weak after a hit to the face. Your the one who’s weak. Getting on your knees and begging. That’s pitiful. I regret making you my first love. That wasn’t love. That was torture. Seeing you get violent. Was terrifying. But I grew to become stronger than you. My knowledge. My regrets. My lost of love for you. I regret being with you!

The day we wed. You were dressed in red. I could feel my heart stop when I see you from down the aisle. The moment I thought we would be together forever. I never thought the day were you were in red.

Your lies bled through our home. The home we shared. The home we raised our children in. And yet how will I tell the children. That you lie. You lie about loving me. You lied about forever hold our peace. There was no peace that night. The children were away. I caught you with my sister. The one person I believed in. The person who raised me. The person who was there when my parents didn’t care. I thought of the day you were dressed in red. To thin your lights were tainted in a glass door. Seeping to fall out.

At that moment my mind went out. As I hear my sister call out my name. I look at her with fury! Instead of you wearing red. The room was red. The sheets were tainted a crimson to be said. I look in my hands. I see a kitchen knife. Strands of hair fall from you head. As I took your life. Next thing I knew you were dead. Sirens filled my ears. Flashes of blue and red Fill the windows. The brights light caught my attention. My eyes widen. Before I knew it. I took my life. Till death do us part. Now we were both tainted in red. The red connected to you and me.

I made this journal for you when you begun to read. I never got to see my baby grow into a young lady. If I had a chance to see you grow I would do anything. But unfortunately my time came I wasn’t strong enough to pick you up when you were born. The doctors told me I wouldn’t be able to live for much longer. So I took time into writing through this journal through the days I’ve had left.

Pats 4: To my daughter how are you doing? Are you doing good in school? I hope you’re as smart as your father! Did he finally achieve his dream into becoming a teacher! Oh how much I miss you. I picture in my mind of you taking your first step. Saying your first word. Even reading your first book.

Page 10: To my beautiful daughter your probably 10 now double digits! How exciting soon you’ll be a teen! Oh how I wish I could watch you meet your first love. Which I’m fact is not always the case. One day you’ll be given the talk from you father. But whether you like guys or girls we will both love you dearly.

Page 16: To my beautiful daughter. Your sixteen! I hope you learn well in driving. I’m sure you’ll do excellent with a teacher like your father. Today I’m still in the hospital but your father brought you here and for once I got to hold you my baby. Oh how I wish I could see you go to your first homecoming. If I was there I would’ve taken a lot of photos of you my dear.

Page 21: To my dear daughter your a women now. So I can no longer call you a girl. But you will always by my baby girl in my eyes. I had to write 2 pages today because well I’m getting worse. I’m fighting for you. My mind is full of future memories of you. But my hand has gotten weak so it’s hard to write now. So I let your father write as I talked. My dear daughter. This is the age of fun parties and young love. I have a surprise sending to you when you ever get married. My wedding dress is for you to use for whoever you married. But if you choose a different dress I won’t be hurt at all. As long as you are happy. Don’t drink much. When you do drink careful around guys. Guys tend to do stupid stuff.

Page: 25 Dear daughter, This is no longer your mother writing. It’s your father. Unfortunately your mother passed away yesterday. She didn’t suffer she went out with peace. She left you her necklace to wear so you can always keep her close to you.

Sincerely. Your mother

There’s a hole in my heart. Where you use to be. You filled my life with love. You filled my life with passion. I carried you with me through hard times. I can’t imagine a life without you. Your bright smile is like the sun on a cloudy day. Your jokes light up my heart. You light up my heart. Your kind words brush My heart so gently. They day I lost you. My world shattered. Instead of your smile. I get a memory. I replay your jokes. In honor of you. I wear a tattoo close to my heart. In memory of you. I wear that hat you always wore. The day you left. Was the day half of myself was lost. I lost the best part of my life. When I look at old photos. I remember your kind words. Your kind words run through my heart. They left an imprint on my heart. But the day you left me. A hole began to form in my heart. As I slowly loose the sight to seeing you. You left to soon. I loved you. You were everything to me. You lit my world up. I couldn’t imagine a life without you. Although. I spoke to soon. You are now reach your hand up. As a women with a white cloth reached her hand down. You grab her hand. And you slowly began to fly up. As you were no longer in view. All I could feel is your warmth slip away. You’re cold. Colder than the ice in winter. That’s when I knew I lost you. That’s when I knew my heart was damaged.

I wake up to the color red. The sky is painted with bits of red. When the sky’s awake the day is awake. The sunrise indicates a new beginning. The yellow of the sun shining through the clouds. Represent happiness for the day. The pink that are coated into the clouds. Represent the memories that happened the day before. The brisk of dark blue above the sun is the end of yesterday. The sky’s awake. The sun wakes up. The sun wakes up to a beautiful planet. Some say sunsets are the best. Sunsets indicate the end of the day. End of mistakes. End of happy memories. The sunrise is the start of the day. New mistakes. New memories. New plans. The start of the day is the start of a new born child. The sunrise wakes the baby from slumber. The sunrise wakes the world from slumber. The sun is awake. The sun is slowly peaking through the clouds. The sun shines through the night sky. Colors burst through the clouds. Red. Pink. Blue. Orange. Colors that bring the world beauty. Colors that bring life to the world.

My childhood is running out. I’m almost 18! Some think that’s a good thing. I think it’s a bad thing. 18 means your no longer a child. You learn responsibilities now. You don’t have time to party. But before 18. You could go to the park with friends. Ride down a steep hill and crash a bike. Childhood means being reckless and creating fun memories with friends. As 18 slowly creeps by I think about the fun I had. Being a child was the best part of my life. We would go camping with the family. Fishing at the lakes. Jumping off a boat into the lake. Playing monkey overboard at montero park. Christmas presents that were toys. Toys that are no longer sold to the new generation. The new generation won’t have as much fun as I did. The new generation is all about technology now. When I was a child we didn’t have cellphones. We had curfews which was when the lights turn on. Play until the lights turn on. Well now after so many years the lights finally turned on. As I go from playing at a park to walking home and becoming an adult. Sometimes you want to grow up. But sometimes you want to enjoy the age your at. Childhood is full of happy memories. Childhood is full of sad memories. Childhood is full of funny memories. Sometimes you have to keep your childhood memories. In order to really grow up into an adult.