May 25 Jeremy,

I spoke with Alison today. She seems to be moving past the debacle at Spinster, but I don't want to make any assumptions. One month may sound long, but the mind has a way of warping time. Hours pass like minutes, months like days.

Your letter dated May 12th feels like it arrived just yesterday. How are Eliza and the baby doing? Have you chosen a name for your handsome son yet? His eyes speak to me through the photo you sent. I take it out every so often and see a lot of promise in his future, in the strength of his features and the sharpness of his gaze. In many ways, he will be a boon and a burden to you, I can feel it.

I trust you will be careful with him, Jeremy.

Yours, Bobby

June 3 Dear Bobby,

Thank you for your letter. Your insight has always proven to be invaluable in the situations that matter.

I am glad to hear that Alison is beginning to move away from the past; however, I still think it wise to keep our distance. Eliza is doing well, as is baby Cormoran. We would love to bring him over to visit, but perhaps in a few more months. It is likely the sight of little Corm will be too painful for Alison, and I would like to avoid causing her any unnecessary hurt as she goes through the grieving process.

We feel your absence here earnestly, Bobby. Every day, I am anticipating the time that we may meet again. That day cannot come soon enough.

Always, Jeremy

June 8 Jeremy,

I arranged to have the courier bring this immediately to your doorstep. I must urgently update you on the latest developments. Alison has gone. I have no clue as to where she may have run off to, but I have an inkling that she may be headed your way.

Alison has been exhibiting the recurring symptoms of her illness for the past two weeks. I thought it might pass in time, just as it always has in the past, but this time may be different. She has suffered a great loss, and I am deathly afraid of what permanent damage it may have done to her psyche.

I send you this as as message asking for assistance, and as a message of warning. Please be watchful, and be wary.

Yours, Bobby

June 10 Dearest Bobby,

It pains me greatly to hear about your distress. Eliza’s mind has been preoccupied with thoughts of Alison since we received your last correspondence.

I am afraid that much of the blame for Alison’s reaction must fall to me. I feel I should have taken action at the courthouse to mitigate the stringent ruling that has been imposed upon her and, by extension, upon you as well.

I have instructed the gardeners and the servants to keep an eye out for poor Alison. Trust that I will ensure that she receives the proper care if she arrives at the estate. If you are correct that she is on her way here, then consider it a happy circumstance, my friend. Aside from yourself, there is no one else who will take care of her better.

If she arrives with a clear mind, this may well be the reunion that we have been wishing for.

Always, Jeremy

June 15 My dear Bobby,

I presume you have been busy coordinating with the authorities to find Alison. It concerns me that five days have passed without word from you. I would like to know if all is well or not.

Eliza has her hands full with Cormoran, but if you need my presence there, I will leave town straightaway and make the journey.

I only wish to know that you are all right.

Always, Jeremy

June 18 My dear Jeremy,

I hope you will pardon the shake in my script as I write this. I am using my left hand as my right has suffered a significant injury. The doctor surmises that it may not return to its fully functioning state.

The details of my injury can wait, however. I write this time to bring you good news: we have located Alison! She was found two days ago by the local bookseller when she wandered into his shop. She was ghastly white, and the starved look in her eyes when they brought her home broke my heart. I hate the thought of her enduring any suffering, no matter how briefly.

She has not spoken since coming home, and her eyes remain glassy and distant, but it is enough at the moment to know that she is lying with me tonight in our warm bed.

Yours always, Bobby

June 20 Dear Bobby,

Eliza and I were ecstatic upon reading your last letter. She even shared the news with little Corm. We know that he is young yet to know what is going on, but it felt right to disclose Alison’s condition to him, if only to familiarize him with her name.

I am glad to know that your spirits are on the rise as well. Please keep me abreast of your situation with Alison as I will worry incessantly if I do not hear from you. I would also like to hear what happened to your hand—I pray that the injury will not prove to be a lifelong bother.

Stay safe.

Always, Jeremy

June 22 Dear Jeremy,

It was amusing to my ears to hear you speak of Cormoran as you did. Knowing who his parents are, I am sure his intelligence is much advanced for his age. I have no doubt that he is already very familiar with Alison’s name, and has an inkling of the business that has been going on.

I have always appreciated the amount of concern and attention you rain upon me. Incessantly, as you say. I wish to express the same for you. And for Eliza as well.

Keep me posted on Cormoran, please. When it comes to your family, it keeps my soul quiet when I know everything is doing fine.

Yours always, Bobby

June 26 Dear Bobby,

Thank you for your kind wishes. I have passed along your message to Eliza, and she agrees that sharing news of Corm with you is an excellent idea that we will oblige willingly.

We both feel that Alison will also benefit from hearing about his life. However, you may be of a different mind. As the one who knows her best, I defer to your judgment on whether it would benefit her mental state to hear talk of Corm while she remains apart from him.

I may be mistaken, but I sensed a tone of apprehension in your last letter. Though, of course, I may be imagining things. You know how I worry so.

As always, let me know if there is anything amiss in your situation. If anything, writing to a dear friend about it can often offer mild consolation.

Always, Jeremy

June 29 Dear Jeremy,

I assure you I am in good spirits. Perhaps the apprehension you read in my letter was merely a side effect of my most recent preoccupations to which I find myself glued for hours on end. True enough, the moment I sent your letter off with the courier, I immediately rushed home to return to what has been keeping me busy as of late.

In the hours that I am not working, I spend all my time with Alison, who has miraculously taken a turn for the better. I believe that my conscientious doting upon her played no small part in her swift recovery. I have always said that a mind captivated by worldly things leaves no room for irrational thought.

I have been reading to her the works of history's greatest minds—that of philosophers and scientists alike. She has taken very much to the writings of Hume and Wollstonecraft and now spends hours perusing their material.

I am certain that, given another month, she will be more than healthy enough in mind and body to make the journey to your estate. In the mean time, she expects every letter from you to be filled with details about Cormoran. I shared the contents of your last letter with her, and she was positively ecstatic. She sends her profuse thanks to you, and sends her best regards to you and Eliza—as do I.

Yours always, Bob

July 4 Dearest Bobby,

I am glad to hear that Alison is recuperating smoothly, and reiterate the invitation I sent you in my earlier letters. Your presence is more than welcome in our home. In fact, Corm has been exhibiting idiosyncrasies that remind me eerily of Alison.

Yesterday, I saw him gazing at me with such a profound lucidity that I felt goosepimples arise on my arms and neck. It was the very same look that Alison unconsciously gives one who has her undivided attention—a look that seems to pierce the skull and decipher thoughts.

Perhaps his manifestation of Alison's mannerisms is a sign that it is time for them to get reacquainted.

Eliza and I miss your company terribly. Let me know soonest when you are able to make the journey. I will have the servants ready our home for your arrival.

Always, Jeremy

July 6 Dear Jeremy,

It is so wonderful to hear that Cormoran has started to adopt his mother's traits. News of this sent her into such ecstasy that she immediately started to plan our visit, wishing to advance our journey to next week.

She is still getting things in order here, but she promises that she will notify me at once when she is free to make the trip. Meanwhile, she requests more stories of Cormoran please. It is truly as if hearing about him feeds her soul.

Always, Bob

July 9 My dearest Bobby,

Attached here is a daguerreotype of myself, Eliza, and little Cormoran. We had it taken last week. It is our first photograph of Cormoran and we would like you and Alison to have it, at least until you are able to visit and have one taken with him.

Our little one has turned into a precocious little hellraiser of late. He has developed a fondness for apple sauce and at times refuses to eat anything unless it is absolutely coated in it. Not to worry—it is not too trifling a matter for us. His antics, in fact, only manage to impress and beguile us because they show such strength and surety of character. A strong-willed infant is good news for us. He will surely turn into a fine gentleman who can rule the estate with a firm and steady hand. We are endlessly proud of him.

I look forward to seeing you and Alison soon.

Always, Jeremy

There’s no curse more twisted than love. She knocked me down, my head pounding as it fell on the icy gound with a thud. She looked at down at me like I was less than human. Like I was just another body to her. I try to pick myself up, but she kicks me, my side throbbing with pain almost immediately. I hate to admit it, but I’m happy. I’m happy that she’s the last person I see before I draw my final breath. My eyes flutter closed, my surroundings becoming blurred as the pain started to subside. The letters from months ago seemed to rush back to me, as the last thought I could form.

‘Dear Aspen, I’m so sorry for not writing back for the past couple weeks! I’ve just been so busy after being appointed as the new military commander in training. I’m sure that you’ve been busy as well, since we left. I’ve made so many new friends, and they’ve all been so kind to me. We train vigorously, usually I’m wiped out as soon as the training ends. But I love it, the feeling of adrenaline pumping through my veins. I love the feeling of being tired and sore but being able to push through it. How have you been? We’ve achieved the same role, just like in our school days, remember that? When we would just argue and bicker on and on? To think that it was only a few months ago. Write back soon, okay? Stay safe, Raein Divine.’

Our school days. I took them for granted. I took all the classes we had together for granted. I took our studying sessions together for granted. I took the laughs we had during lunch for granted. I took her smile for granted. We used to be able to just be kids. Now I had to choose between my kingdom or her. I had to choose between killing her for my kingdom, or letting her kill me.

‘Dear Rae, I, as well, have been terribly busy lately. Our training has progressed from being physical into more mental and strategic. We’ve been tested on what would be the best move to take in case of emergency. We should meet to catch up again some time. We haven’t talked in person ever since we were pulled out from school to fulfill these roles. I think it’s an incredible coincidence that we both have the same role! I’d like to congratulate you, though you’re only a month younger than me. Your birthday just passed a day ago, I was supposed to surprise you, but my mother didn’t allow me. She told me to focus on my training, since it’s the most important thing right now. Happy 16th! I hope this letter finds you well since you think your birthday is cursed. But I think that it’s blessed, since you were born on that day. I heard my father talking about how we were going to war with a nearby court, and it slightly scares me—the thought of actual war. I must rest now, but please keep in touch. Yours, Aspen Kae.’

We never got to say goodbye before we left. We just smiled and waved. I wish I could go back. I would have never accepted this position if I could.

“Dear Aspen, What a coincidence. My mother was talking about how she was going to wage war against a nearby court as well. We may see eachother sooner than we thought! I think we’re going to attack a rival court, how exciting is that? When I see you, we can talk for hours and hours, just like we did before! Much love, Raein Divine.”

I didn’t have the chance to write back. My people and hers fought against each other.

“Dear Aspen, how could you? How could you do that? I saw you on the battlefield. I saw you kill them. I saw you kill my friends. We weren’t even at war. You killed them for the fun of it! What is wrong with you? You said that you were scared of war, yet your actions show that you’re so open to it. From, Divine.”

“Dear Raein, they attacked me first! They were at fault, they were trying to kill me first. I did what I had to. I don’t know what your side has been telling you, but it’s just not true! I care about you deeply, I never knew that my people would do that to yours. I never thought that it would happen, I swear. Please, it is not because of me. I did not order it. From, Aspen Kae.”

“Dear Kae. Our kingdoms have reached a peace agreement, yet you still insist on having more death. If you won’t change, then I just have no choice. I don’t want any more of my people to die. If I had to choose between you, and my subjects, my subjects will be the one to survive. My subjects are everything to me, Kae. I cannot choose you over them. I will never choose you over them. ”

That’s my Raein. She won’t put any effort into trying to change something that cannot be. I never had the chance to write back. I received the letter the day before the real war was waged. My father only declared war because he thought that’s what I needed to stop being so empathetic. He thought that making me choose between my people and the love of my life would make me a better ruler. I chose her. I chose her because I love her. I chose to die for her, and it made me happy. The most twisted curse became my downfall.

A/n : Thank you so much for reading all this! I’m a teenager trying to practice her writing skills, I’m sorry if it’s badly written.

I grimaced when trying to stand up Light filtered through the small widow above the bench now that it was morning I had to get back to the mission I tried again but collapsed from exhaustion.Naomi must have heard the fall and was by my side in an instant she tried to gently lift me but I could tell she couldn’t that or she didn’t want to hurt me “sorry..” Was all I could manage to say

“It’s alright l will get my brothers.” Naomi said then she helped me shift into a sitting position against the bench then she left

I thought about getting up but it wouldn’t be the best idea before I stubbornly agreed with myself Naomi was back with her brothers The soldiers came on either side of me then they lifted me back on the bench.I felt bad for I couldn’t help them even if I wanted to

“Thanks.” I said trying not to let my hurt pride show,the soldiers nodded then walked outside again Naomi just stood there as if she was unsure what to do,then she must have remember

“I appreciate you helping me out Naomi,you can call me Ghost.” I returned

“Would you like something to eat?” Naomi asked

It just occurred how hungry I felt I didn’t eat before the battle and it’s been a day since

“Yes, thank you Naomi.”

༆༄༄༄༆ “𝖶𝖾'𝗏𝖾 𝖻𝖾𝖾𝗇 𝗐𝖺𝗅𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖿𝗈𝗋𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋!” 𝖫𝗎𝗇𝖾 𝗌𝖺𝗂𝖽 𝗐𝗁𝗂𝗅𝖾 𝗍𝗋𝗒𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗈 𝗄𝖾𝖾𝗉 𝗎𝗉 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝖣𝖺𝗋

"𝗐𝖾𝗅𝗅 𝗂𝖿 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝖽𝗂𝖽𝗇𝗍 𝗎𝗌𝖾 𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖼𝗈𝗆𝗆𝗌 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝖺 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖼𝗄𝗂𝗇 𝗌𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖼𝖺𝗌𝗍𝗅𝖾 𝗐𝖾 𝗐𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽𝗇𝗍 𝖻𝖾 𝖻𝖺𝖼𝗄 𝗍𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖱𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝗇𝗈𝗐" 𝖣𝖺𝗋 𝗋𝖾𝗉𝗅𝗂𝖾𝖽 𝖺𝗌 𝗁𝖾 𝗍𝗋𝗂𝖾𝖽 𝗌𝖼𝖺𝗇𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗌𝗍𝗎𝖻𝖻𝗒 𝗅𝗂𝗍𝗍𝗅𝖾 𝗌𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖼𝖺𝗌𝗍𝗅𝖾

"𝖾𝗁 𝖺𝗍 𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗌𝗍 𝗂𝗆 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝖺 𝗌𝗍𝗂𝖼𝗄 𝗂𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗆𝗎𝖽." 𝖫𝗎𝗇𝖺 𝗌𝖺𝗂𝖽 "𝖨𝗆 𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗋𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗈 𝗆𝗂𝗌𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖽𝖾𝖺𝖽 𝖱𝗎𝗌𝗂𝖺𝗇 𝗌𝗈𝗅𝖽𝗂𝖾𝗋."

༆༄༄༄༄༆ "𝖨𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍 𝖦𝗁𝗈𝗌𝗍 𝗆𝗒 𝖻𝗋𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋𝗌 𝖼𝖺𝗇 𝗀𝖾𝗍 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖻𝖺𝖼𝗄 𝖧𝗈𝗆𝖾." 𝖭𝖺𝗈𝗆𝗂 𝗌𝖺𝗂𝖽 𝗐𝗁𝗂𝗅𝖾 𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗀𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝖻𝖺𝗇𝖽𝖺𝗀𝖾𝗌 "𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝖼𝗎𝗍 𝗂𝗌 𝗉𝗋𝖾𝗍𝗍𝗒 𝖽𝖾𝖾𝗉 𝖠𝗅𝗅𝖺𝗄𝗂 𝗆𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗅𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝖺𝗍 𝗂𝗍 𝗂𝗍 𝗆𝖺𝗒 𝗇𝖾𝖾𝖽 𝗌𝗍𝗂𝗍𝖼𝗁𝖾𝗌."

𝖧𝗈𝗉𝖾𝖿𝗎𝗅𝗅 𝖠𝗅𝗅𝖺𝗄𝗂 𝗐𝖺𝗌𝗇𝗍 𝖺 𝖱𝗎𝗌𝗂𝖺𝗇 𝗌𝗈𝗅𝖽𝗂𝖾𝗋 𝗈𝗋 𝖺 𝗌𝗉𝗒 𝖨 𝗍𝗁𝗈𝗎𝗀𝗁 𝗍𝗈 𝗆𝗒𝗌𝖾𝗅𝖿 𝖭𝖺𝗈𝗆𝗂 𝗆𝗎𝗌𝗍 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝗌𝖾𝖾𝗇 𝗆𝗒 𝖾𝗑𝗉𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗈𝗇

"𝖣𝗈𝗇𝗍 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗋𝗒 𝖠𝗅𝗅𝖺𝗄𝗂 𝗂𝗌 𝗆𝗒 𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝖻𝗋𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋𝗌 𝗁𝖾 𝗂𝗌 𝖺 𝖬𝖾𝖽𝗂𝖼." 𝖲𝗁𝖾 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗌𝗎𝗋𝖾𝖽 𝗆𝖾

"𝖮𝗄, 𝖨𝗆 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗄𝖿𝗎𝗅𝗅 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗁𝖾𝗅𝗉 𝗁𝗈𝗉𝖾𝖿𝗎𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝖨 𝖼𝖺𝗇 𝗋𝖾𝗉𝖺𝗒 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗄𝗂𝗇𝖽𝗇𝖾𝗌𝗌."

𝖭𝗈𝖺𝗆𝗂 𝗅𝗈𝗈𝗄𝖾𝖽 𝗌𝖺𝖽 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝖺 𝗌𝖾𝖼𝗈𝗇𝖽 "𝗉𝖾𝗋𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗌 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽 𝗍𝖾𝗅𝗅 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗁𝗈𝗆𝖾𝗅𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝖿 𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗌𝗍𝗋𝗎𝗀𝗀𝗅𝖾, 𝗐𝖾 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗃𝗎𝗌𝗍 𝖻𝖺𝗋𝖾𝗅𝗒 𝗀𝖾𝗍𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖻𝗒 𝗐𝖾 𝗆𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝗌𝗎𝗋𝗏𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋."

"𝖨 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗌𝖾𝖾 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖨 𝖼𝖺𝗇 𝖽𝗈 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗒𝗈𝗎," 𝖦𝗁𝗈𝗌𝗍 𝗋𝖾𝗉𝗅𝗂𝖾𝖽 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝖾𝗆𝗉𝖺𝗍𝗁𝗒

"𝖨 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗀𝗈 𝗀𝖾𝗍 𝖠𝗅𝗅𝖺𝗄𝗂." 𝖭𝖺𝗈𝗆𝗂 𝗌𝖺𝗂𝖽 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝗐𝖺𝗅𝗄𝖾𝖽 𝗈𝗎𝗌𝗂𝖽𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗁𝗎𝗍

Anna, For three years I’ve been wishing things would change. I miss our picnics and our laughs. I’ve missed having someone I can talk to and trust. Your my only friend An. I need you, please come home. Jeremy

Jeremy, I miss it too. Everything. And I want to come home, but Mom moved me out here for a change. A chance at a new life, I need to take it. I’m sorry. But I’m not coming home, because there is no home. Not anymore. I’m sorry Jer, I’m so sorry. Anna

Anna, Home is here. With me, with everyone you left behind. If you want a second chance at life then take it. But next time, don’t leave without saying goodbye. And don’t make excuses when you don’t have any. Because I know you, and you never make excuses unless you want to believe something you know isn’t true. You make bad things seem perfect and perfect things seem bad. Don’t do it to your home to me. Jeremy

Jeremy, What do you want from me? Just say it, Jer! Because I know you and your mad. At me, what have I done? I’m sorry I left okay, but sometimes things don’t last. Even the strongest friendships. Anna

Anna, If you had stayed, I’d you hadn’t run away. Then maybe you’d understand things. Maybe you’d understand that I’m not hurting because I lost my friend. I’m hurting because I lost my soulmate. But I can tell it’s different for you, maybe we’re supposed to be like this messed up, and torn apart. We’re different people form different worlds. But I want to be part of yours, no matter how long it takes. Jeremy

Jeremy, We’re two different people from two different worlds. There’s no wood to build a bridge or boat to cross the water. And it’s just the way it is. I can’t try to be part of another world that isn’t mine, neither can you. So maybe we should just stop. Right now. I’m sorry, but this is my chocie and I’m not letting you cloud my vision. Anna

Anna, I loved you. I don’t know how for why I just did. And our friendship that’s not something you can take away or change, it only comes out of love and respect. You have friends so you don’t have to do the terrible parts alone. And I’m sorry that you needed a second chance at life, but maybe if you had looked both ways before crossing the street you wouldn’t have gotten hit. You wouldn’t need a second chance, you wouldn’t have lost me. Because you have, I’m not part of your second life, only your first. So at least I’m saying goodbye. Jeremy

Anna ever wrote back. Neither did Jeremy. They just kept living life. And eventually their paths crossed, but they never became best friends again. They talked but never laughed, cried but never smiled. And Anna knew it was her fault. Jeremy thought it was his. So they both kept living, moving father away. But one day their paths will cross again, because something as strong as the love they both secretly had for another isn’t something you can replace. Like Jeremy said you can’t take it or change it, it only comes out of love and respect.

August 1945 Reinette,

It’s been years since we’ve spoken, and even longer since you’ve gone into hiding. But recently I’ve been thinking about us. My mum’s dredged up some pictures of us she found whilst cleaning. I miss you. Oh gods, I miss you, Nettie. I hope you miss me. I’m just going to send this to your old address in hopes you can read it someday so you can know I’ve been thinking of you.

Yours, Charles

~

October 1945 Reinette,

I don’t think you got my last letter. If you did, you would’ve replied by now. If you did, you wouldn’t be safe. So I suppose I’ve been writing to nobody. That’s alright, just getting my feelings down on parchment. I don’t know how I quite feel about you yet. I do know that I want you to come back so we can sort this out.

Yours, Charles

~

January 1946 Reinette,

I’ve taken some time to think about what I wrote in my last letter. About how I didn’t know how to feel about you. I do now. You see, when we were eleven years old, best friends sworn to one another, I fell in love with you. I fell in love with you hard, the way you fall asleep. You feel the drowsiness coming, like you know you’re about to fall in love. It starts quickly, and then you’re caught up in the moment. Nettie… I’m falling asleep for you all over again.

Yours forever, Charles

~

May 1948 Dear Charlie,

I fell asleep for you first.

Love, Nettie

August 23rd, 2021. 7:45am PST

Dear Mum, I just wanted to let you know that I have acquired the apartment I was telling you about during our last conversation! It’s right near the water, and a short walk from town. I think you would love it!… except for maybe the stairs. But the high ceilings, and several windows, make for a nice, cozy home. I’ve already hung a few pictures and set up my record player. Last night I listened to some Blue Rodeo in honor of you! I think I’m going to pack up and go out for my daily surf at a place called “Long Beach”. It’s a magical place that I know you would absolutely love. I will also be sure to send you pictures of that as well. Anyways, I will try and call later this week when I get a chance. Signal is a little spotty over here on the coast.

Love, Pete

---

August 27th, 2023. 11:45am EST

Hey Son, It’s great to hear that you have settled in nicely at your new home. Hopefully you have managed to make some friends out there, and have managed to find some work too. The pictures you sent were incredible! Your place is a complete reflection of you, and Long Beach looks like something out of a movie. I can see why you chose to live there. Is that where you called me from after your surf on Monday?

On another note, I was admitted to the hospital yesterday, as my lungs are still not receiving the right amount of oxygen. I fear that the COPD I was diagnosed with years ago is getting worse, and I don’t know how much time I will be left with. I don’t want to cause disruption in your new life, but if you are able to come home, it would be nice to see you and hear your voice.

Let me know what you decide. Ray and I will gladly pay for your plane ticket home

Love, Mum

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August 27th, 2023. 5:48pm PST

Hey Mum, Never mind about my place or the routine I’ve got going on here. I will do everything in my power to get back home to you as soon as I can. I just informed my work that I will be taking off the next week, and they are totally understanding. Although, I would still come regardless… even if that means having to find a new job when I return. Seeing you is my first and only priority. I appreciate the offer from you and Ray, but I’ve got some flight credits left over from last year, so I will just use some of that to cover the cost of the flight. Looks like I can potentially get on a flight on Monday, so I will go ahead and book that. Stay strong this weekend, and I will see you soon.

Love, Pete

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August 29th, 2023. 4:52am PST

Hey Mum, I know it’s still early (before 6am) but I couldn’t sleep much last night after booking the flight and thinking how long this weekend will be. So I ended up calling Air Canada at 4:30 this morning, and bumping my flight to leave sooner. I briefly explained the situation, and the lady was kind enough to place me on a flight that will be leaving this afternoon… so It’s possible I could see you tonight. I’ve still got a bit of coordinating to do with a rental car, but I’m actually catching the bus at 9am to get to the airport soon. I will let you know when I’m about to board the plane.

Love, Pete

---

August 29th, 2023. 11:36am EST

Hey Pete, I just wanted to let you know that early this morning your mother was admitted to the local Hospice. Her condition has worsened, and we fear there isn’t much time. I have ensured she is comfortable and taken care of. I’m not sure if you are able to get a flight back sooner, but I will cover the cost if you need any help with that.

Love, Ray

---

August 29, 2023. 9:57am PST

Ray, I am actually at the airport as we speak. I had a weird feeling last night, and decided to change my flight to leave this afternoon. So I am just waiting for them to start boarding the plane. It’s scheduled to take off around 11:30 and I should be landed in Toronto around 7pm. I have a rental car that I will pick up as soon as I land, and I will be on route to you guys as soon as I can. Please tell my mom that I love her, and that I will see her soon. Thank you for all your help!

Love, Pete

---

August 29, 2021. 6:27pm EST

Peter, This afternoon at 3:34pm, your mother passed away in her sleep. She was at peace and comfortable. She knew that her boys loved her and wanted to get home to be with her. But she couldn’t be in pain any longer. It’s hard to believe she is gone. I loved your mother so much, and it will be hard to imagine a world without her smile and laughter. I know this will be difficult to process, so please give me a call when you receive this message. I’m currently at the Hospice with your Aunt Janet. We are going through the paperwork shortly, so everything will be sorted out when you get here. I will explain the next steps when I see you. Please remain strong, and know that I love both you and your brother.

Love, Ray

---

August 29, 2023. 7:20am PST

Dear Mum, It’s been almost two years since you left. It’s an odd thing to process, and at times I often wonder what things would be like if you were still here. I miss you like crazy, and wish you could be here to provide your guidance and blunt honesty that I sometimes hated growing up. By as I’ve gotten older, I have learned to value that opinion… it was often the voice of reason, and allowed me the chance to see another perspective. Now, I have to go with my gut, and think outside of my normal train of thinking… without you here, I am forced to take my time with decisions and really absorb the options. But it still doesn’t fill the void you left behind. I miss calling you during my commutes and catching up on life. I feel at this time in particular, I’ve got some pretty big decisions to make in life, and I find it difficult with assistance of you and Ray. It’s crazy to think that you are both gone. Ray obviously was heartbroken and couldn’t bear to be without you… I guess that’s why he left us just a few days after what would have been your 70th Birthday. I’m not religious, but I do hope that whatever happens after death, it’s the same for everyone. In that case, I imagine you two are together walking endless beaches with beautiful sunsets, hand in hand. I thought you should know that I have met someone who I think is quite special. But I have been very hesitant on putting any kind of label on it. Normally she would have to pass the mother test, but instead, I have relied on the opinions of the friends I have made here on the West Coast. She’s a hard worker, who also came from Ontario seeking a more nature focused life… so she has that similar desire inside as me. She’s quite creative when it comes to painting and drawing… she’s got a green thumb and enjoys things like gardening and herbal medications… and she comes out surfing with me as often as she can. I’ve decided that I don’t want to live together yet, because I think it’s important to have our own spaces for the time being… but I DID buy a trailer last week that I plan on taking down the coast this winter! And I think she will accompany me on this journey. That will be a great test to see how our lives can blend together. I don’t know what will come of it, but I m excited. I think you would be too. I know you would like her, so that makes me happy. I wish you were here, but I understand that it would mean suffering and pain. So I’ve come to terms with that and tried to remain strong during the tough moments in life. I wish I could have been there for your final moments, but I know that Ray’s presence ensured that you were not alone. I’m grateful for all the time we shared together growing up, and even as an adult. You were not only my mother, you were one of my best friends, and I will always love you and hold you in my thoughts. On my upcoming west coast trip, I will do my best to take photos and document the process because I know you always enjoyed reading/seeing those types of things. So I will use that as my motivator to make the most of it, and truly absorb the experience.

Until we meet again, With endless and unconditional love, Your son, Pete.

S, I am so sorry for the pain I caused you. I never intended for you to find out this way, but I also know you wouldn’t have given up until you found out my identity. You are so smart, almost as smart as me and that is why you were able to figure out my identity so quickly. I think that’s why we work so well together because we are both smart and understand each other better than anyone else. If I could love, there would be no better person for me to love than you. Alas, it wouldn’t have worked out between us because you despise everything I stand for and you want to see me behind bars for all the chaos I have caused. I only wish you would come to my side because you would do so well as a villain.

Sincerely, J

---

J, I trusted you. You were my best friend. Turns out you were my mortal enemy masquerading as my best friend. How could you do this to me!? You are right, I do despise everything you stand for and I want you to pay for the crimes you have committed by going to jail. We both know you are not capable of loving anyone, you only love yourself and money. I now know what you are truly capable of and I will do everything in my power to catch you making sure you cannot hurt anyone else. As for me being a villain, you are right that I would be good at it but I prefer to use my smarts to help people not create chaos.

Sincerely, S

---

S, Just wait, I know that you will become a villain eventually. I cannot wait for that moment. I did care for you in my twisted way, I never let any of my associates come after you. Money is power and we both know it. You have no idea what I am capable of, but you’ll find out soon. Good luck with catching me, let the games begin.

Sincerely, J

---

J, Why didn’t you let your associates come after me? I already put some of them behind bars and I will get you. I know having money is power, but power isn’t everything. You will mess up and I will be there to catch you. I am the best chance to catch you and you know it, that is why you pretended to be my best friend. You don’t know what you’re talking about, I will not become a villain. The hunt has begun and the game is afoot.

Signed, S

My Letti

It’s been a week without you in my arms. It pains me to think you might miss me as much as I you.

Thus far we have been on the move. Bus to train train to truck. We are getting close now. Everyone is feeling it. Nerves are high. A young lad, Hugo, won’t shut up about his Matilda. Everyone is getting over his moaning. But they are newly weds. I must admit, I cannot blame him. For what I want most is to be there with you.

I’ll write again when able.

With love, Your Stan

Dearest Stanley

I admit I smiled more than I should have at your letter. To think you’re so far away leaves a hole in my heart.

Your mother has visited on multiple occasions. She and I prey for your swift return. We had your favourite pot pie the other night for dinner. I still remember that time you tried to scoff it down as soon as it got out of the oven. Your mouth was stinging for days.

Stay strong Your Letti

My Letti

I now know the truth of war. Horrible to say the least. Your letter was the light amid the darkness and I will treasure it always. It rests beneath my pillow so you are never far away. Please, tell my mother how much I miss her, and father.

We are not the first regiment, we are lucky enough to be on the back lines. But we see the ferried dead returning by the truckload. We all fear that will be us soon enough.

I’ll spare you the gruesome details.

Please, go to our spot and have a picnic for me. Enjoy the sun, and live in our happy moments. That is where I reside most of the time.

Forever yours, Stanley

Dearest Stanley

My love I am with child. The joy I feel is immeasurable, but it is tainted with the thought of your imminent danger. Come back as soon as able. I miss you with all my heart and I could not bare the thought of losing you.

I did as you said. A picnic down by the river under the willow tree. Just as we did, I fed the ducks and basked in the sun. I swear I could feel your hand in mine. I forgot the distance for one moment of bliss.

Know now that you fight not just for me, but for your child as well.

We await your return Your Letti

Dearest Stanley

I await your response. My mind fears the worst but I won’t let it win. I stay strong by picturing you holding our baby. That gets me through the darkest times. Pot pie again the other night. Anything to hold you close.

Fervently yours Letti

My Stanley

It has been 2 weeks with no word, but I know in my heart that you are there, still fighting. You have to be.

I fear that any day news will come, that which came to dearest Mable yesterday. Her Laurence will not return. I too have seen horrors my love. War hurts the innocent just as the guilty.

Your Letti

My Letti

A baby, my love I can not believe it. My heart soars higher then should be possible.

I’m sorry to have worried you Let, the trade routes had been cut off. But I’m here now, and glad to be.

Give my sympathy to poor Mable. Many brave men have found their way to heaven. So much pain my love. We have lost a few in our regiment. Men who did not deserve to die.

I fear Moral is low. Every night we go to sleep to the sound of Hugo’s sobbing. He’s just a boy Let. Too young for this pain.

I await the day I’ll have you back in my arms. Yours always, Stanley

Dearest Stanley

I cried like never before in receiving your letter. Relief comforts me so. I passed on your words to Mable, although they seem a small cruelty after Laurence’s departure. She is putting on a brave face. Now a single mother, I do what I can to help her. We all do.

The smallest of kind deeds in these tough times mean the most. It gives hope.

Endless love to you Your Letti

My Letti

I’m coming home. As much as that news brings me joy, I can not be happy. They are all gone my dear. I am what’s left of the 34th.

I am a changed man. Not only is my heart filled with sorrow, but I am now lacking a leg. It may take me some time to return. But I am on my way.

Our wish came true my love. But it hurts to know Matilda will not get to feel the happiness you and I feel.

All my love Stan

My dearest Stanley

I have no words. I feel cleft in two. Happiness that you will be in my arms soon enough, but saddened by the loss of so many. Please, hurry back. I’m lost without you.

I have thought on some names for our baby.

Hugo for a boy, or Matilda for a girl.

Picture me waiting for you, down by the river. Under our Willow tree.

With my whole heart I await your return Your Letti

M, Me writing this letter is probably pointless. Considering we don’t exactly see eye to eye. How you feel is valid. But shutting me out is not what I expected from you. I will continue to write these letters for the sake of me letting my feelings be known. I know that I chose a horrible time to tell you all my feelings. 2am, in the middle of a parking lot isn’t exactly what I would call romantic. But I had to do it. I had to get it out of my body before it started to fully consume me as a person. It was already eating away at me every time I saw you with them. I just can’t get your face out of my head. The look that will be burned into my frontal cortex until the end of time. I know my timing was horrible. But I had to say it. Because I really do love you. You’re my best friend. You’re the first person I want to talk in the morning and the last person I want to say goodnight to. I miss everything about us. But you made it clear I guess. You don’t want me. You want them. All over the phone. 6 minutes of just horror that will haunt me forever. I just wish you could see my face and say it to me that way. Look me in the eyes and think of all the memories we have together and say that you never felt anything for me. Because I know deep down in your heart you do love me. You just won’t let yourself feel it. Or act on it. I’m not forcing you to do anything. You have made your choice. But just know that I will always care about you. I will always love you. Even if time goes by. I’ll wait. Because when you have what we have you see it through. You’re my penguin, my otter, my for life. Love always,

• S

Dear Bee,

Your shoe is untied.

Did you check? Sorry, that was an immature thing I often did in order to get a laugh but you never laughed too so it was never really funny. My nail broke earlier this morning while cleaning and I searched for hours trying to find it.

I don’t know why. It reminds me of my endless searching for you. I don’t know why, but I do.

Pony,

I’m glad you’ve reached out but I do not want to talk to you. You must understand this, right? I never much want to talk to anyone. You are no an exception although I wish you were because when I opened this letter there was a stopping of my heart. If I had died then, would you have saved me?

I did check to see if my shoe was untied. I never understood your humor but your laugh was a sound I could hear forever. Let’s not be silly. Shall I call you Andy?

Dear Bee,

Please do not call me Andy. It’s a name I haven’t heard in a while now. If you were to call me that, what would I call you? Your name has always been bee. I remember you chose my name because you hated yours. You didn’t want to be the only different one. I like you because you are different.

I would save you. I thought about it for hours and I would save you. I think I need to know, though, would you save me? I am so lost, Bee. I am so lost.

Dear Pony,

Your letter sat on my table for weeks before I decided to respond. I don’t want you to be lost but I don’t have a map. I’ve wandered down the wrong path and can’t find my way back to you. Stop writing me, please. It hurts me to talk to you and you know that.

I did what I did because I had to. I didn’t mean for it to cause such misfortune.

Dear Bee,

When we were seven, I finally asked you why your name was Bee. Do you remember what you said?

“Everyone hates bees.”

You had to protect yourself. I never was mad at you. I did bad things. I fell into the pit and couldn’t find a way out. I tried climbing up and digging but nothing worked. I had to get comfortable. I was stuck.

Dear Pony,

How did it feel? There were times when I was walking by and would nearly slip in but I managed to walk steady. Was it worth it? Do you ever wish you hadn’t done it? This will be the last time I write you, Pony. I didn’t tell you but I’m married now. I have a daughter that I named Andrea. She doesn’t know who you are.

You were my best friend.

Dear Bee,

I like to think it was worth it if it had to be between the two of us. I much rather it be me in here instead of you. Also, I’m happy you got married. Andrea is a lovely name, isn’t it? I’m very proud of you, Bee. I get out of here in three years. I no longer count down the days. Time has stopped moving for me and is now moving because of me.

For what it’s worth, you still are my best friend. I hope you end up reading this letter. You don’t have to reply. It’s hard for me to forget you. I don’t plan on doing so anytime soon.

I want to make sure you know that I never hated bees.