TW mental health

(Im okay)

I just woke up and I’m feeling numb,

To my own thoughts I wont succumb.

My mind it races all the time,

The reason why? That I cant define.

I need to distract myself and fast,

Play some music and make it last.

Because things cant always feel like this,

But thats a thought I just dismiss…

Perhaps I need some time apart,

Self Isolation. Thats a start.

Becaus...

the game has gone to overtime again.

the game has got our teeth aching, white-knuckled grip on nothing

the game has us praying for a last-minute buzzer beater, a final act of god

the game has the next shift hurting, yet we still believe ourselves to be divine

the game has us all thinking _it’s gonna be me i just know i’ll make sure of it_

the game has gone to overtime again.

the game has tha...

I build my pyre with weary hands,

A reckless dance on crumbling sands,

To watch my world in flames unfold,

Burning bright, then turning cold.

The embers spark, they rise, they scream,

Cons...

His eyes showed no emotions,

not even an ounce of devotion.

He carried a lot of baggage,

Due to the fact he felt average.

His time was near and dear,

But only him and god could

understand that type of fear.

His eyes you couldn’t read,

due to them being overshadowed

by the unforeseen deeds.

His eyes showed no emotions,

not even when he took the potion.

because he was now gone,

not ab...

-I did it again

I gave in

I made a mess on my skin

Then wrote a poem about it

I thought that I was better

I really, really did

But I crack under pressure

So I’ll atone for my sins

I won’t eat today

And I won’t eat tomorrow

But I’ll smile anyway

And cover up my sorrow

I’m stoic that way

And really, it makes sense

I don’t deserve to eat

After doing that nonsense

I’m useless

I’m worthless

...

I think you want me to agree with you

Trying to convince me

that _you_ are always wrong

Because in some tangled way

if I agree with you

then that means you’re right about something...

Uncontrollable anger is the only emotion I know.

Lashing out, hurting everyone around me.

It's the only thing I know how to do.

Screaming, crying, swinging fists.

My sobs wrack my body when I'm alone.

Why do I hurt everyone around me?

Why can't I just be happy?

Why am I so _explosive_?

Take a breath.

I'll be okay.

Wipe my tears.

It's just a minor inconvenience.

But...

Uncontrollab...

My name might as well be anxiety.

It’s claws have gotten to my head,

and it’s teeth have sank into my throat.

It’s scared me into crying in my bed.

I’ve been calming down a bit, though.

Less thoughts at the wake of night.

I’ve been getting more sleep

and getting fewer times of fright.

But I’m always one to look back.

It’s claws reach for my head

and it’s teeth gnaw at my throat.

Anxiety has more...

I

Am

The

Monster

Hidden in the darkness of a cave

Disconnected, a bounded slave

My surroundings are a trove of my unwanted past

Bounded limbs are testaments I can’t outlast

I

Am

The

Monster

Imprisoned by man

Just another thing they aren’t willing to understand

You stumble upon me when you are lost

And then get angry when you must pay my cost!

I

...

I fell in love with you hard and fast

You were what I’d imagined for myself

The sound of your voice, your smirk, the way your body fit mine

Your ambition and your endless search for more

The way you seemed to melt at the sound of my voice

The way you almost cried when we first said goodbye

I fell in love with our videochats every day

With the silly little updates you would give me about your life...