I pick up my phone. Waiting for any sign of my old friend. “Is this even right?” I say to myself. I was the asshole I know that is true. But the dreams and the… just everything.

I try to talk to her through the app. Commenting and liking. Just to know that I still stalk her. Then I tell her “do u wanna talk?” And she comments back “yes” this is the first time in a while something has happened so...

A child, small and delicate, ready to conquer the world.

Innocent, soft and righteous.

Family surrounded her, but the beast was there dressed as her hero.

The beast stole her innocence, he exploited and mistreated her.

Mishandling and ill treatment.

The villain soon appeared, she came to her realisation that her hero she looked up had ceased to be visible, he had vanished.

She grew angry and...

I forgive you

Even though you made me ache

Even though you made me blue

Even though you made me feel like a mistake

Even though I felt awful

Even though I was worthless

Even though I was empty, not full

Even though I felt like being lost in the abyss

Even though I cried, would always angrily shout

Even though I threw things all over the place

Even though I always would pout

Even though I felt l...

Step 4 says to make a fearless moral inventory,

To clean all our resentments off the shelf.

But what’s a girl to do when the biggest resentment in her heart,

Is the one that she still holds against herself?

Step 8 says to make a list of persons we have harmed,

“Make direct amends,” as per step 9,

I’ve followed these instructions, and forgiveness I’ve received,

From every heart I’ve hurt… aside ...

_We _both _made promises_ that we couldn’t keep

_We_ both _created_ our own defeat

_We loved_ and_ lost_ ourselves and each other

We laughed and _cried _and _took comfort _in another

And even though our future is dead

I can rest easy and forgive and forget

Knowing that our future has guided and led

To no place I’d rather be instead....

There’s a lump in my throat.

I’m being choked.

My eyes well up with tears.

My face scrunches up.

There is an intangible feeling of utter despair.

Or pity, or disappointment, or many.

It’s as if my throat is welling up with tears, as if the air is leaving such dilapidation, there’s nothing to describe it.

There is an intangible hand grabbing my neck,

Digging it’s nails into the skin o...

To wake up is sometimes tough

It’s jus unexpectedly rough

But you push it through

With all your will and strength

Tell yourself the most beautiful things

Remind yourself how beautiful it could feel

But who we kidding right?

Pretending to be tough and tight

Fake it till you make it is what we heard

To keep that going on is purely absurd

But no matter what let’s fight

Who knows anymore what’s wron...

i can feel the blame in my bones begging to be let out like a snake just waiting to strike.

youre little notes floating around the house,

that happened to be the last straw for him to take that gun

how can i forgive you when im not sure

i can even forgive myself?

for letting you push all of us away,

i had a say too, didn't i?

I should have reached out sooner

been there more often

picked up t...

“She’s so stupid.” 

“She’s so slow.” 

“She’s so fat.” 

“God! I know.” 

I heard your conversation 

With those girls that I don’t like 

Why do you seem to hate me? 

Do you do this out of spite? 

I was angry, but I stayed quiet, 

I never wanted to forgive you.

Except…I can’t hold a grudge for long

So I don’t know if my words were true. 

Can I forgive? Can I forget? 

I may never truly know. 

I wan...

i can’t forgive you even if i tried

(not that i’m going to)

i can’t forget the words you said

i can’t forget the things you’ve done

i can’t forget it

i can’t forgive it

and i’m never going to....